When I was younger I liked to think life was a grand adventure. I would go to my neighbors and play with the kids who were my age. I was old. Eight years old, ready to take on the world. So I would walk on over and tell the kids about the grand adventure that was life. We made up a game called, “The Game.” There was no real objective to the game, but the rules were that everyone got to pretend to be someone they wanted to be. Not someone that already existed, but a completely different person, that could be and would be anything our minds would make of it. We played “The Game” often.
I grew older and the childhood lunatics ended as well; my thirst for the grand life unending. Life was big, full of potential. And I would realize that potential—in my dreams. I was never much of a doer, I liked to avoid conflict, keep to myself and watch the stars at night. I liked to think I had deep thoughts once in a while.
Life was not as grand as I had once planned it to be. Sitting just seemed to be too regular of an activity for me. I suppose everyone must have gone through an existential phase, but I genuinely questioned the nature of my life. There was no more purpose for me, the grand life or not, it wouldn’t matter. And I was wrong to think so, but on I would continue life.
But I met a girl, thought it was worth a shot. Looking back I may even say it was the best decision of my life. Although, admittedly it wasn’t really my decision. So maybe life does suck. It has an endless supply of grab bags with useless shit in it. Half the things in the bag were put in there just to get you to regret your decision of grabbing the bag in the first place. Another quarter is what you’d exactly expect in a grab bag, useless. But there are the gems. And maybe that’s why we continue grabbing. Boy was I a sucker for that smile.